A Little Dose of Reality

I stood looking out the window leaning against the kitchen counter my head in my hands. I began to sob as the busyness of the week took hold. I had been up that morning since 5am. I had milked the goats, finished barn chores, driven an hour to take our daughter to a morning youth camp with a friend. (It was too far to come home in between dropping them off and picking them up.) My full intention had been to sit with a cool cup of coffee at a delightful coffee shop and catch up on my summer reading list. (I don't actually have a summer reading list, but it does sound like a good idea). I managed part of that aim for the morning; I sat with a coffee in hand and began to flick through my book to the page I had left the story at. However, my mind was not in it. Instead, it whirled with everything I had to accomplish that day, that week. I sat with pen and paper in hand and began to research the information we needed for the coming school year for both of our children, and some other information I needed for the farm and the business. Before I knew it, it was time to pick the girls back up and head home. Once home I made another batch of soap, took care of the puppy, figured out dinner, and began barn chores once again. That's when my husband found me in the kitchen, head in my hands and a sob escaping my lips. It's not that I don't love what we do, but the reality is that sometimes it all gets a little too much. You never quite get the satisfaction of a job well done, when the laundry piles are always there, the enclosures need cleaning again, and the school year is set to begin before the summer even comes to a close. I had just finished one day, and the next was staring me in the face, much the same as that day. Up at 5am, milk, drive the girls to camp, get some research done, drive home, make soap and lotion, prepare dinner, barn chores....... and so, the list goes on. What was it that made my days seem so overwhelming? Sometimes I wonder if grief plays a role as I miss my daily telephone conversations with my Mum and the sharing of our days. Sometimes I wonder if age plays a roll (but we'll leave that one right where it is as I like to think I'm getting oldER not old!) Sometimes, I think life just gets busy and we forget what it means to take a little time for ourselves.

The next day dawned new and fresh just like the one before it, but I determined this day would be different. I didn't want to get to the end of this day head in my hands and a tear escaping my eyes. This day as I dropped the girls off for the morning, I drove a little while to a coffee shop and with an iced coffee in hand I sat opened up my book and began to read. I didn't let my to-do list nestle its way into my thoughts; I chose not to think about what I had to accomplish once I got home. I sat in this little coffee shop by the window in a comfy seat with the light streaming in and enveloping the beautiful tall plant in its path, sipping on my iced coffee with a good book in hand. It was just one morning, one morning given over to reading a book just for the fun of it, one morning of not allowing work, the home, the farm, the busyness to nestle its way into some much needed down time.

Sometimes it is hard to prioritize, and everything seems to need to be done now, and what doesn't get done now is still there the next day and the next day. However, sometimes you just need to put those things to one side and take a little R&R, even if just for the morning, with a good book and an iced coffee in hand.

I'm ever so thankful for the busyness of our newest little ball of fluff that has graciously found her way into my heart and our home. She adds a certain spunk and fun that was sorely missing when Duke left our home and our hearts. Yes, there is a certain amount of work that goes with training a new puppy, and cleaning up after a new puppy, but when they are as cute as she is it tends to make it all worth it.

So, as this week progresses and the work piles up just the same, I'm going to remember that little coffee shop with the light streaming through the window, glinting off the beautiful plants that adorned its window-sill, and I'm going to be thankful for all that we have been blessed with that makes our home a home, even if a little bit of a busy one at times.